Tears for Fears

The highs and lows of the MBA.

This morning we had a FANTASTIC discussion in our marketing class. I was right in it, my mind was whirling with ideas and considerations. It was a fast pace discussion but in the end, my recommendation from the homework was right on pace with the prof and the rest of the class.

... and then Finance started.

As usual, the class started with 'by now everyone in the class should be finding this easy.' Crap - this is NOT easy for me. At break I thought I'd better ask for help, additional reading material, ANYTHING that might make sense. And the answer, there isn't something. 'Hang in there, it gets better from here.' Well frankly, it can't get any worse. I literally can't put any more time into this course without further jeopardizing my other courses.

I broke.

At break I snuck away and cried in the bathroom. Super embarassing, but I don't take well to feeling stupid. While I do trust my prof when he says it'll get better, I can't help but be reminded about Grade 12 when Mr. Graham (my OAC math teacher) told me that based on what he'd seen so far, I didn't have any home of passing the course.

Mr Graham made me mad, and I did end up passing the class. This situation is SO much worse than that because Kent is really nice and encouraging and I still really don't 'get it'. His niceness literally reduced me to tears.

Clearly it's time for fries, chips and chocolate - with textbook mixed in.

Apparently next week will be easier to understand and not understanding at this point is not unusual. I will TRUST in the process, but can't promise there won't be any more tears along the way.